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第7章 残废

　　'Did you hear it?' I again inquired.

　　'I cannot commission you to fetch help,' he said; 'but you may helpme a little yourself, if you will be so kind.'

　　'Nor ever had, I suppose: do you remember them?'

　　'Did you hear it?' I again inquired.

　　The roads were heavy, the night misty; my conductor let his horsewalk all the way, and the hour and a half extended, I verilybelieve, to two hours; at last he turned in his seat and said-

　　I shook my head: I could not see how poor people had the means ofbeing kind; and then to learn to speak like them, to adopt theirmanners, to be uneducated, to grow up like one of the poor women I sawsometimes nursing their children or washing their clothes at thecottage doors of the village of Gateshead: no, I was not heroic enoughto purchase liberty at the price of caste.

　　April advanced to May: a bright, serene May it was; days of bluesky, placid sunshine, and soft western or southern gales filled up itsduration. And now vegetation matured with vigour; Lowood shook looseits tresses; it became all green, all flowery; its great elm, ash, andoak skeletons were restored to majestic life; woodland plants sprangup profusely in its recesses; unnumbered varieties of moss filledits hollows, and it made a strange ground-sunshine out of the wealthof its wild primrose plants: I have seen their pale gold gleam inovershadowed spots like scatterings of the sweetest lustre. All this Ienjoyed often and fully, free, unwatched, and almost alone: for thisunwonted liberty and pleasure there was a cause, to which it nowbecomes my task to advert.

　　The Sunday evening was spent in repeating, by heart, the ChurchCatechism, and the fifth, sixth, and seventh chapters of St.Matthew; and in listening to a long sermon, read by Miss Miller, whoseirrepressible yawns attested her weariness. A frequent interlude ofthese performances was the enactment of the part of Eutychus by somehalf-dozen of little girls, who, overpowered with sleep, would falldown, if not out of the third loft, yet off the fourth form, and betaken up half dead. The remedy was, to thrust them forward into thecentre of the schoolroom, and oblige them to stand there till thesermon was finished. Sometimes their feet failed them, and they sanktogether in a heap; they were then propped up with the monitors'high stools.

　　'Madam, I should like some tea,' was the sole rejoinder she got.She hastened to ring the bell; and when the tray came, she proceededto arrange the cups, spoons, etc., with assiduous celerity. I andAdele went to the table; but the master did not leave his couch.